2013-07-28 RIP Eileen Brennan

Eileen Brennan will always be Mrs. Peacock to me.  Clue has been one of my favorite movies since I first saw it in the theater.  We must have gone to go see it a dozen times in the theater trying to track down the brilliance of the alternate endings that were sent out to different theaters.  It is one of the best ensemble cast movies ever made and there isn't a weak link in the entire cast.  Mrs. Peacock was the eccentric ditz whose mismatched wardrobe walked the fine line between rich and crazy cat lady which only made you love her more.

Her career was more than this one amazing role, she was the Drill Sargent in Private Benjamin with Goldie Hawn and won an Emmy when she reprised that role for the TV series.  She was also in The Sting with Robert Redford and Paul Newman and The Last Picture Show. She was a Broadway star, she was the original Irene Malloy in Hello Dolly, and turned movie and television actress.  She was on almost ever major television show during the past 30 year from Murder She Wrote to Blossom to Taxi to Tales From the Crypt.  She was even the crotchety voice for many children's cartoon characters including the cartoon Dennis the Menace.  Eileen Brennan was amazing actress has moved on due to losing her battle with bladder cancer at a hospice in Burbank, CA.  She was 80 years old.
 

Babies are great....I just can't eat a whole one

If you type "Royal Baby" into Google you get "About 2,100,000,000 results (0.30 seconds)".  It is a headlining story on ABC, CBS, NBC, USA Today, Washington Post, etc...  Everyone is royal baby crazy.  My friend Kells Hildebrandt had one of the best reactions that I have seen:

"I mean, I know it's exciting when people have babies, but are we really celebrating that a university educated woman gave up a career to become a welfare recipient, and spend the rest of her life dependent on public criticism of what she wears and what offspring her uterus produces? Indeed, let's fucking reinforce the patriarchy a little more. And also, we should wait with baited breath until the baby's name is released after christening, a tradition that dates back to days when individuals actually didn't have names until the Church recorded them. What century are we in?"

Yet, as we are judging and wondering why it's all over the news and why people care, we're talking about it too.  Sure, I really don't care what the name is, unless it's something crazy like Obadiah, Ishmael, or Eleazar...really there are any number of awesome old Biblical boys names that would be interesting.  However, I think that we as America care about the Royal Family because there's part of this country that will always be connected to England because it wasn't that long ago that we were a colony and it was part of our culture.  We're barely over 200 years old as a country, we're young.  We moved out of the house and we're living on our own, but as a country we still not really adults yet.  It's like we're occasionally calling home to hear what the old gang is up to while we're finding ourselves at college.

We don't have a royal family in America.  We've elevated celebrities to this status because we want to believe that there are people out there who are better and more interesting than we are and traditionally this role was filled by the monarchy.  It's in our nature to want to believe that there is something better and that getting a glimpse of it makes us connected to the objects of our obsession.  And yes, I just called people objects because that's what we turn them into when we believe we have the right to know every detail of their lives and to judge them for it, because the rest of us are obviously perfect.  We relate through faults because it makes us feel like the people we idolize for their talents are just as human as the rest of us.  We judge and make fun of them because we're jealous that they're lives seem better then ours.  If we were secure and happy in our lives we'd leave them alone, but we're not.  No one is contented and that's why we watch Jerry Springer, why we read tabloids, why we care that a woman that we have never met, thousands of miles away has just had a baby just like thousands of other women did at the exact same time, but since this one's going to be a Prince and may someday be King, we care.

Me, I'm just going to keep reading the only tabloid I ever had a subscription to, Weekly World News!

Moving into the 21st century!

I am so very angry at Comcast. We need to have internet access because if I do not have internet I will murder everyone not be able to do my homework and for a little bit extra we got basic cable.  Basic cable means we get the bare minimum, sure no HB-Ho, Skinamax, or Show-me-time, but also no FX so I can't watch Archer or American Horror Story, no bunches of other channels that I didn't realize were fancy and most recently they just took away TBS.  I live in Atlanta, the home of Turner, and we don't have Turner Broadcasting Station...seriously, that's really messed up.  What am I going to watch when the History Channel isn't running a marathon of serial killer documentaries, cult docudramas, specials about zombies, Caligula and giant snakes?  (And that marathon is seriously how I spent this past Saturday, everything mentioned was played all day!)
I have an ancient 32 inch TV that I bought when I first moved to Atlanta.  It was bought for a Superbowl party at the Gothic Halfway House(TM).  The TV was too big for the entertainment center so we twist tied a a jug of water to the back of it to keep it from toppling out.  It was a wonderful engineering design of those in their early twenties.  I eventually got an entertainment center that the giant TV fit on and it's been a faithful TV for many years.  The last few years the picture started flickering, the sound occasionally bounces off and on so I starting thinking that when it dies I should get a new TV. So almost 2 years ago I inherited a 50 inch flat screen TV.  For almost 2 years it has been sitting on the floor of my junk area dining room just taking up space and blocking my ability to get to the bottom shelves of my bookcase waiting for the 32 inch TV to die so I can replace it with a beautiful 50 inch flat screen modern technology.  However, the loss of TBS (among other channels) prompted me to want to rearrange the everything I do from eat to use the computer to do homework and work living room to make room for the giant 50 inch tribute to modern technology and have it close enough to the router so I could hook up the internet to the Blu-Ray player.  I always said that once we rearranged the the living room to accommodate the internet I'd get Netflix...turns out I may not have to!
So I plug everything into the internet and it asks me if I want to sign into my Amazon account.  I have Amazon Prime because it's cheaper then all of the shipping I would have to pay with all of my school books I have to order each semester.  Turns out that along with free two day shipping I get a bunch of movies and TV shows live streaming for FREE!  I am a cheap ass bitch and love getting things for free.  Finally I will be able to watch Downton Abbey which I have been missing since it started because I don't have a DVR and I'm never home when it's on.  Tonight, I watched American Horror Story for the first time.  It was awesome, the entire first season is free!  Sure, I may be behind, but at least I can catch up rather than not get to see it at all.  I realize that this is old news to most people, but I am excited about getting to watch television shows that I haven't been able to.  Maybe now I will quit threatening to cut a bitch if they tell me how a series is going to end because I may actually already know for a change.

**EDIT**  Add TNT to the list of channels they just took away...

Dementia Juice at Dad's Garage June 21 - July 27

So one of the perks of working at a theater is sometimes you get free tickets to other theaters, that whole professional courtesy thing.  In this case it was, "hey, come help take the 7 Stages Youth Creates program to Dad's Garage to see a play" ...so for the rest of this review please keep in mind we had around 32 children ages 9-19, six of them from Holland and three of them from Israel with us in the audience.  (Explaining some of the phrases that didn't quite translate was both awkward and awesome)

If you are unfamiliar with the amazing experience that is Dad's Garage, it has been one of my favorite theater's since I moved to Atlanta.  With productions like Debbie Does Dallas the Musical, Reefer Madness the Musical, drunken midnight puppet slams, classes and amazing improv workshops and shows it has one of the most active and creative theaters in town.  If you're going to/have make/made it as an actor in Atlanta Dad's Garage is somewhere on your resume.  And in August, Dad's Garage is moving into 7 Stages because they've lost their lease so these two amazing forces will be combining for a ton of awesome!  However, this means that Dementia Juice is the last show that will ever be in the current Dad's Garage space.  It's change and it's kinda sad.  The first show I ever stage managed in Atlanta was at Dad's Garage so it hold a special place in my heart.

• Rodrigo (Lucky Yates, left), Helena (Amber Nash), and Daniel (Tom Rittenhouse)

So, Dementia Juice...the write up for press states, "When you meet your girlfriend’s parents for the first time, you want to make a good impression, right? Unfortunately that’s pretty hard to do when the walls are melting, everyone’s faces keep swapping, and her dad catches on fire right in front of your eyes. Either you just walked into a Dali painting or you’re on a serious acid trip."  A young scientist who may have found the cure for dementia gets ready to meet his beautiful fiance's eccentric parents and shows that there's a fine line between being insane and being on drugs.  This show is a combination of puppets, live acting, the best use of the main stage space and curtain system I have ever seen there and a custom toilet that you have to see to believe.  Sure, there's partial nudity, incest, Polyamourous Satanic Masons and a little plant sex, but that's what I've come to expect from Dad's Garage over the years.  There were so many moments during the show I was laughing out loud, a few times I was laughing so hard I was in tears.  It's a little bit like Animaniacs and Evil Dead II got drunk during a vintage horror convention and this was the result...did I mention there's an awkward dance number?

Written and directed by Kevin Gillese, the Artistic Director of Dad's Garage and Michael Haverty, the Associate Artistic Director of 7 Stages, I hope that this is a sign of the amazing things to come when the two theaters share a home for a while.  Also, if you're into the show Archer, Helena is played by Amber Nash (voice of Pam Poovy) and demented/dementia ridden Rodrigo is played by Lucky Yates (voice of Doctor Krieger) and they do a wonderful job as the in-laws-to-be.  Their zany hi jinx was a wonderful balance to the young scientist Daniel (played by Tom Rittenhouse) who has a great journey from mousy scientist to acid tripping defender of love along with his baseball referencing fiance Rachel (played by Perry Frost) as the semi-straight men in this show.  This is an amazing high note for the building to go out on...I am sure that the weird energy of Dad's Garage will be a legacy in the condos they will be building on it's rubble.  

Dementia Juice Through July 27. $7-$21. Thurs.-Sat., 8 p.m. Dad's Garage Theatre, 280 Elizabeth St. 404-523-3141. www.dadsgarage.com.

Why I haven't added you on Facebook...

1a) We've never met. You randomly sent me a friend request and I have no idea who you are or why you're adding me.  You didn't send me a message or anything introducing yourself and we have no mutual friends.  You do not need to know that I OBSESSIVELY CHECK IN ON FOURSQUARE to make it easier for you to stalk my ass.  You also don't need to hear all my personal thoughts about stupid crap that is too lame for me to even post here.  Seriously...if you think this shit is trivial you would think I had too much time on my hands, and sometimes that's the case.

1b)We've never met, yet we have a lot of mutual friends.  I usually notice that you live far away, like Timbuktu, and yet we have like 50 mutual friends...they're all other burlesque performers.  I'm going to assume that you're a fan and though I appreciate your enthusiasm for my art it's my personal profile my family is also on and I don't want someone going all fan boy talking about how awesome my tits or ass is IN FRONT OF MY DAD.  Thanks for the compliment but really, go add my Katherine Lashe Fan Page so my family doesn't have to read that shit.

2) I have too many friends all ready.  This sounds really vain, but in all seriousness I am not on line enough to be able to read everything everyone posts.  I miss stuff all the time, in some cases important things like I was out of town last week and I miss the fact that MY DAD WAS ROBBED until almost a week later.  Yeah, maybe it's weird that we keep up with each other on Facebook, but we do because I have a crazy schedule with all of the theater stuff and he sometimes stays awake for 36 hours and then sleeps for 12 and I don't know at what time he's awake because he's retired and living on a crazy schedule because he can.  I actually artificially kept my friends list to 666 people because I thought that shit was funny.  Ooooh...evil number of friends!  Really, it was just a random number but it was pretty funny for a minute when other people realized I always had exactly 666 people on my friends list.

3) We've met, but you don't have a pic of you up.  You have something cute for your profile picture or no profile pic which means I can't see what you look like and I am super bad with names.  What does this mean? I HAVE NO CLUE WHO YOU ARE, we might as well have never met.  If I can't look at your picture and know who you are I probably won't add you.  And posting a baby picture doesn't count because frankly I don't talk to anyone I knew as a baby outside of my family and I'm already friends with all of them.

4) We've met only once in passing.  Again, PERSONAL PROFILE, so again, I don't really know you so I'm not very likely to add you on my Facebook page.  There are casual acquaintances I have kind of known for years I haven't added, don't be offended that we met for five seconds once and I didn't immediately go out and add you.  You don't need to know that I had a shitty day and am wanting to vent about how I am cranky because I haven't been able to get my toes did or because I ate some shit that didn't agree with me and I am dying and why won't my friends bring me Taco Bell and Ginger Ale to make me feel better.

5) I don't want to.  Yeah...that's about it, I may just not really want to.  Sometimes I'm a bitch like that.  I'm only allowed 5,000 friends on Facebook and I plan to choose each and everyone of them VERY CAREFULLY.  It may be nothing you did, it could be one of the other reasons listed above or it could just be that for what ever reason I don't feel comfortable letting you have access to all the crap that dribbles out of my fingers from my insane brain because I don't want strangers or respected members of my community to think that I am bat shit crazy.

It's not you, it's me.  Seriously, I'm crazy, neurotic and I have moved passed issues to volumes.  So yeah, please don't be super offended if I haven't added you.  I have almost 200 people waiting for me to add them and this is after I just deleted a bunch of them a a few months ago and I just started breaking the 666 rule.  Have a nice day!